Step Four: Share

Now it’s your turn. You’ve given them the headlines about your concerns.

They’ve had some space and time to say where they’re coming from.

So now they need to hear your side. But where will you start?

• Do you give them a seven-word summary: ‘you’re not doing your job’?
• Do you lay out a detailed list of their shortcomings?
• Do you deliver it as an unappetizing praise-sandwich?

While it’s just a story, it shows the power of our imagination for negative and inaccurate conclusions about a situation.

Observations or Conclusions?

Imagine you saw John wagging his finger and shouting, while looking at you in a team meeting last week. You decide to call him aside and say